Ep#10 Take your power back by making powerful choices with Leslie Fieger

Leslie is the author of several books including the world-famous DELFIN Trilogy (The Initiation, The Journey, The Quest) and the creator of Delfin World. "I have made it my life’s work to empower others. My self assigned mission in life is to enrich the lives of others. I am here to empower you, to enrich your life, to assist you to create the success you desire." Leslie says "I decided many years ago that the purpose of my life was to revere, to relish and to contribute.”

Leslie has spoken live to people from stages all around the world and his online webinars have been viewed by over 2 million people. 

In this conversation, Leslie tells us we can have everything taken away from us except for our ability to choose in response to a given situation or circumstance. We can get caught up in what's going on in the world, and that becomes our reality, or slow down and decide how you relate to the world and what you want to believe. We can choose to be a creature of events and circumstances or a creator of events and circumstance. Meditation is learning to be aware of being aware and being in yourself. After spending a lot of time in Zen Temples in Japan, staying in Ashrams in India, Leslie's greatest meditation teacher is his dog, Jasper!

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Contact Leslie Fieger

https://www.delfin.world/

https://www.youtube.com/user/LeslieFieger

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https://johanncallaghan.com

https://www.facebook.com/authorjohanncallaghan

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:07

[inaudible]

Speaker 2: 0:08

Welcome to the empowering family health podcast brought to you by your host, Joann Callahan in the world of disempowered and struggling families. It is my hope to bring you inspiration information and support to take back control of your life and live an empowered, healthy, and happy life. We will be into being parents, doctors, health, experts, and professionals in all areas of health and wellbeing. Uh, my aim is to transform you into the masters of your family's future. Okay. Hi everybody.

Speaker 3: 0:46

You're very welcome back to another episode of the empowering family health podcast. And today I I'm super excited. I'm super excited. Every week when I have my guests on today, I am particularly excited to have Leslie vaguer on and Leslie has taken I'm so appreciative of the time that he is taken out of his day to day to be what us and just to introduce you to Leslie. So Leslie is the author of the depth and trilogy, and he's the creator of self and world as well, which I I'm actually part of that program. And it's absolutely incredible. So, Leslie, thank you so much. You're very welcome. It is an honor to be here with you. I'm really looking forward to our conversation. Joanne. So am I pretty brilliant? And just before we started recording, we just had a very brief conversation about what we're going to talk about and you know what, see, honestly, I was this morning when I woke up on, I was prepared when everything and I was gonna have to have this perfect and really have everything ready. Cause I'm talking to Leslie Viagra, like, you know, and I'm just like to just have a conversation with Leslie, he's another human being and let's just have a conversation and whatever comes up, I think in conversations, Leslie is just brilliant. So what we created was we'll just have a team basically. So we're just going to talk about, you know, how people's realities occur for them and really getting conscious as to how we're thinking and how we create the world around us and how we respond to everything that's going on around us, outside us rather than what's important to us as individuals. And then we're also going to have talk about being still and about, you know, really going inwards or, you know, finding out what it is that's really important to us. And meditation is a big part of that. And people don't like that word meditation it's very loosely used. So we're going to break down all those misconceptions and talk about the importance of really slowing down. And that's one of my biggest things that I say to people, you know, you want a constant productivity and you know, you get more Dawn when you spend time doing nothing and just reflecting or just being, just being nice. So, Leslie, what are your thoughts? What are your thoughts on all the subjects? That's, there's a lot of ground

Speaker 4: 3:00

To cover there. Um, first of all, I think because you said just being present, uh, I started meditating, um, at the age of 18, excuse me, Maharishi Mahesh. Yogi came to Calgary, Alberta, Canada, where I was living, um, in my teenage years. And I went to see him at the Jubilee auditorium and I got really excited about this whole concept of meditation. So I went, I paid for my mantra. I did the transcendental meditation training program and started meditating. So you know that that's what 52, yeah. 52 years ago. Wow. Okay. Um, so a lot of years of meditating, so, you know, my greatest meditation teacher turns out to be my dog Jasper, right. Um, a few years back, we were out, we go hiking almost daily, right? We're out hiking. And, um, I was, um, busy thinking, you know, just busy thinking as I'm walking, which is ridiculous. Cause I'm out into the forest, right? Mind is going a million miles an hour thinking about stuff and we stop and Jasper comes running back to me and believe it or not, he said to me for God's sakes, just be present in the presence of the divine. So whenever we go out walking, I'm always reminded of that is just being present. Right? So meditation, despite the fact that I had this formal education, if you will, about how to meditate and whatnot over the years I've been in ashrams in India, Zen temples in Japan, done all kinds of stuff in was native peoples around the world, Australia, North America, South America and indulged in various kinds of meditation and trans dancing and ceremonial stuff. And all of that kind of thing. Um, for me now my constant form of meditation is simply walking in the woods, being aware of myself, being physically present on this planet and just like Jasper said, be present. Right? So I think for most people who are, you know, maybe a little bit put off by the concept of meditation and what it means and how do I learn to do it, am I doing it properly? And all of this kind of stuff is really, it's just a question of slowing down enough to pay attention to your breath and your presence, your physical presence, and getting relaxed with in being in yourself, being in your physicality and recognizing that you are alive and present within this miraculous universe. Right. Um, and I think that's probably the best thing that we can say about meditation is it's a learning to be aware of being aware, right, for it to be aware of being aware of yourself and your existence within this miracle that we all exist with them. And that is, um, as easy as, you know, maybe just taking off your shoes and going, walking barefoot in the park or something, right. And just slowing down, calming down, paying attention to your breathing and being present. And I think you're dead right about the circumstances we find ourselves in these days. There's a lot of noise and confusion out in the world. A lot of fear being pushed out around there that people are getting caught up in. And, you know, for the last quarter of a century, I've been doing my level best to show people, um, that they are capable of making a choice between being a creature of events and circumstance or being a creator of event with circumstances. Now that choice is very, very clear to us. You know, we can be caught up in what's going on in the world and that becomes our total reality. Or we can take a step back, slow down, be present and understand that we can decide truly decide for ourselves what we want to believe about ourselves and our relationship to the world, how we want to think about ourselves and how we want to think about who we are and what we're capable of achieving, creating and contributing in the world. And I'm capable of choosing how to feel so we can choose to be caught up in the world and fields of fear and the uncertainty and the anxiety and all of that kind of stop. Or we can choose to relax and say, okay, I'm alive. It's a glorious time to be alive. It's more adventurous than a lot of other times. And it's great fun to be here at this time and, um, go about, you know, walking through the world, being present and being aware of the sacred nature that we all are and just living your life that way. Right.

Speaker 3: 8:11

It's really great. Um, Leslie, because you know, a lot of time, so many of us go rind and we have this judgment as constant judgment of other people around us and blame and not accept and who we are. And you know, we're saying things like, well, because of him, I now have this circumstance or whatever may be. And we just, we're just not taking responsibility for our own actions are, you know, who we want to be, where we're always blaming on George and, and an awful lot of it is coming down. Obviously there's a lot of conditioner from my mother growing up in our culture, the society, our parents, whatever, all that conditioning program. And so there's a lot of us. And, you know, I think for a lot of people, it's a constant struggle, striving to survive in the world, you know? And it's, it's exhausting when we're doing that all the time. What do you think?

Speaker 4: 9:05

Well, it's exhausting if you think you're caught up in a struggle. Absolutely. Because you know, you're always striving to overcome something, but if you, I think, you know, people say, go with the flow. That's not necessarily what I mean. Um, but if you simply allow what is taking place to be right and understand that the way you respond or react to what is going on, uh, is a different thing than what is going on. Right. And you know, you can't necessarily control what what's happening in the world. You know, you can't change the orbit of the earth. Right. And you can, um, tell a particular politician what he should be saying, but you can determine how you respond to that. Right. And you can determine your own personal state of being and the way you feel about things that is entirely within your control.

Speaker 3: 9:58

So that's like what happened to me, Leslie, on the way home, just before our interview, I was on a, I went on a cycle with my daughter, Leah and the pedal fell off and it was a good mile walk by home from where the pebble fell off. And I was like, Oh my God, you know, I'm not going to, I'm going to be late and blah, blah, blah. And I want to know what, look, it's grand, it's perfect, whatever happens is perfect. And yeah, you're dead, right? Like how we respond to circumstances or situations really, it's what gives us our power. And that's really, really important to understand that. And we have the choice and I think the more we practice that, and again, it comes back to awareness that when we're aware, so stop, like don't react straight away. So if you pause, so just pause and think about what happened or whatever, and respond with something or be in control or, you know, just accept what happened except what is, there's a great quote by Jim Rohn. And he says, the sun rises in the East and sets in the West and is not new, can do both us. And that's just the way it is. And it's just brilliant. It's just perfect because there are things and circumstances that occur in our world that you can't do it in a boat. It just stays the way it is or we can choose to have it, you know, disrupt our lives. It's down to us how we see us and how it occurs for us, our perception.

Speaker 4: 11:20

Yes, it is. It is undeniably the way we perceive things, right. That deter that determines how we feel about ourselves and our place in the world. And those perceptions are, um, determined by our conditioning, right? We all go through this educational process to be, to use a kind word. We go through this educational process from our childhood all the way up through progressively through our adulthood. And that conditioning that education very often gives us a set of predilections tendencies to perceive the world in a certain way. Right? So that set of perceptions that we have about our world determines how we feel about ourselves, how we behave, you know, Corgan accordance with that. And as a result of that, determines the results we get to have in life. So learning to understand the perceptions that you have, have been determined by their education slash conditioning slash programming that we all underwent. As we grew up within our families, our society, our culture, um, will give us a better sense of awareness of what determines those conceptions. Those perceptions is way we look at things. And once we understand the reasoning behind the way we perceive things, then we can decide if we, if we choose to change those perceptions. Right. And, um, I prefer to see everything that exists in the world as being sacred. And as a consequence of that, everything that unfolds around me is part of some grand scheme that I may not understand. Right. But I can see the glory in it and I can see the beauty in it. And you know, like you say, the sun rises in the East and sets in the West. I love to get out and greet the morning sun and that amazing, amazing, you know, thing that the sun is consistently out there shining for us and giving us life

Speaker 3: 13:36

Way smarter today. Isn't it? The sun rising up.

Speaker 4: 13:39

Yes, it is

Speaker 3: 13:41

Today. The energy from the sun.

Speaker 4: 13:44

Indeed. It is.

Speaker 3: 13:45

Yeah. And, um, there was something else I was going to say as well. Um, Caroline, Myss I get you're you're probably familiar with Caroline Myss she's no, it wasn't Caroline Myss. I was listening to something that she quoted echo, echo told, who said that, um, we ha we have this conceptual mind we're living in this conceptual mind all the time that we have all of these ideas and concepts, concepts are live in this world of concepts. Right. And we, you know, we're living in a world of short, we should do this. We should do. That's why it's, again, this is the world of rules and, um, things that we need to buy, buy enough, lots of term by a coach and all the rest, but the concept. And I find as well as, you know, really when you it's great. It's great. When you learn all these things about, you know, consciousness all the rest, it's not until you actually apply it. And you experience this, that you get that real transformation. Um, so we can learn all these things and it's, it's incredible. It's great. It's necessary, but it's only when you apply us and you apply it by slowing down and really reflecting on ice, I pose and applying it to your experiences. And something that I love is when something happens. Right. And a question, and I'll say, why did this happen? And a lot of time previously, I used to say, why did this happen to me? And in that moment I was being evicted because I was saying, look, what's happening to me. Like poor me instead of, okay, let's have a look at what happened and separate that from the emotion or the meaning that I gave to us. And when you can separate it to them out, you can get a much clearer picture of why you're feeling or why you're reacting to the circumstance or the situation or whatever. And I, for me personally, I thought that was a really massive experience. And I had a lot of transformations about us. One of the things that I had difficulty with was men[inaudible] did men rice. Cause I had things that happened to me in my life rice. And a lot of people who know me know that I was abused and had a child very young and uh, lots of things around us about abuse, sexual abuse and all the, and it took me a long time to, um, to get over that. But separate that I've been really vulnerable here. And I notice a lot of people in the world who have these experiences and many others, but when I broke it down and that affected my marriage too, by the way, because I was putting up brick walls around me to keep me safe. Right. But what I was doing was not only was like keeping me safe, what it was also blocking out any goodness or any love or any compassion and that that happened in my marriage. Right. But how you are in one area of your life, how you're being, it's affecting you in all your areas of your life. So it's absolutely massive. So when you can break down the water, it happened and the meaning that you gave or the stories, some people call it a story. You give it a story because of what happens. This means that I'm never gonna trust men. Again, I can't trust men ever again because this happened. Um, and I'm just giving a very light surface kind of level of as well. That's what happened. And that was the story that I gave us. And I was living that my whole life. Yeah. Honestly, my whole life I was living in Boston. And I only discovered that maybe in the light last couple of years, or we discovered us, and then I had to do a lot of forgiveness as well, because I was blaming myself. I was giving myself a hard time. So what I'm saying is when I discovered that true reflecting, true, really asking the questions, why, why did this happen? And discovering what I really valued in my life, who I was as a person, what I had to offer the world. And it just happened. The transformation does happens in an instant as well. What happens inside of that being present and being aware. And it's just, I'm going on a little bit here now, but I just think the power of us, I mean, you get your power when you discovered this about yourself, when you discovered these meanings and these stories that you gave to things, these events that have occurred in your life and how you perceive things. And I just think it's really incredible, especially now the way things are in the world, because so many people have their para taken away from them. You know, we're having to conform to so many things, um, at the moment in the world and there's so many rules and it's like a power has been taken away, but really want to point message. I want to give to people is, you know, when you understand what you value on, what you love and really come back to that and live from your soul, like not from what other people, what is everything that's going on around us is what is just, what is, so it's how you understand that a story that you give start, I guess that's what I'm really trying to say. Um, and just the parent, it Leslie, and for me personally, that's what I got out of doing this work and I'm still doing it on, on it's. I was going to say, I'm not perfect, but I suppose I am perfect because everyone's perfect as it is. And as they are now, because there's always something to say and who you're being right now. Um, but there's no morality about it. There's no good or bad or anything, you know, it's, it's just perfect. Um, so I'm going on? So what do you think of that whole thing if you experienced something like that, Leslie,

Speaker 4: 19:12

Yes, I did not suffer any childhood sexual abuse. So, you know, that is a whole different story, um, that I cannot directly relate to, um, individually, you know, me personally, but as far as, uh, assessing blame and telling myself a story about how the world had insulted me in one way or another, um, you know, like I was hurt, I was damaged. I was insulted by the things that happened out in the world. Um, and I had to also go through that process of forgiveness and letting go of the blame in order to be free. Right. And that's what that's, what forgiveness does is it treats you right from not just a historical event or a series of events or whatever, and it frees you not just from the trauma of the event, but it also frees you from that cage that you have built for yourself to protect yourself from that ever happening again. Right. So, you know, we all tend to, um, feel a little insecure about ourselves in one way or another. And if we have suffered damage, um, then we tend to be a little bit more insecure about ourselves vulnerable, if you will. Um, and as a consequence, we all tend to put up barriers of one kind or another to protect ourselves, right. And when we decide that we're willing to forgive the circumstance, the event, the person involved the world for being so cruel and malicious and open ourselves up to the capacity to receive and give love, um, then we become wider. Right. Um, and I think we recognize ultimately that, you know, we are capable of so much more capable of not just becoming more in our of ourselves, but also capable of fundamentally changing the world by the way that we are ourselves, right. That our, our mirror choice to be more compassionate, more vulnerable, more willing to open ourselves up to what the world has to offer, uh, enables us to be a positive change in the world. And I think you can see probably in yourself would, you said your marriage probably improved dramatically when you decided that you're going to let go of and forgive that historical damage. Right. So, and that probably also, you know, will end up having an effect on your grandchildren as well. Right. Absolutely open and grandchildren and great grandchildren.

Speaker 3: 22:26

Yeah. Because we currently carry that in our, in ourselves, you know, when it goes down through the generations as well, you know? So, um, it's, it's a really powerful thing. So when you, um, do that act of forgiveness, I forgive them myself as well. Um, because by forgiving myself, um, I'm owner, I'm taking responsibility of how I've been being around around us and, um, various sort of things as well. And, um, it's just so powerful. It is, it's so liberating, it's so free. Um, and it's like those chains or shackles are just removed and you're just so much more open to possibilities in your life. Like in every area of your life, it really is incredible. Um, and it's when you take responsibility for unlock theater person might be Roy L I'm not talking about my husband's. Well, the other person could be, you know, whoever it is that you had a fight with or whatever may be, cause we all have arguments with people, but they might not be the sweetest person in the world or whatever. Look, they have their own stuff and that's their journey that they're on. You know what I mean? We can't change other people, that's their stuff. And if we try and fix them, we're actually denying them. The learning that they have when we try and find people go around trying to fix other of people. And I think a lot of people do that because it's a distraction, um, for fixing themselves, if you like, you know, putting the attention on somebody else and cause not a lot of us are in denial and even enough, a lot of us aren't even aware that there is that we have stuff going on. It's the blind spots, you know, we're not even aware of, of who we are and how we're being in the world, you know? And I just think it's really so important when we stop and kind of ask ourselves. What's really important to me in my life, you know, to me personally, because when you're being that, then that reflects out into the world and then it reflects in my husband and my daughter in my, my motor, in my, my own family. It reflects in how I am seeing them. I guess it's really incredible. Um, and you have so much more compassion and um, you just see people in a brighter light, you know, and you're creating the world around you when you're free of all this heaviness and resentment and all this kind of stuff, you know, and it really raises the vibration up and that's where we want to be. We want to raise our vibration up and um, and it's so infectious.

Speaker 4: 24:53

Yes. Well, you can tell them, I sit here and I watched your talk and I can see how joyful and happy you are. Um, beyond, beyond the forgiveness. I think once you do that yet, that's a necessary step to forgiveness, right? It's not necessarily a necessary step for giving ourselves first and foremost for whatever flaws we have assigned to ourselves, um, for giving ourselves and then forgiving the people in our lives that we have previously blamed for harming us or hurting us or insulting us in one way or another. Um, and then perhaps forgiving the world itself for being the tough place that it is and forgiving our career, um, and forgiving our creator for throwing us into the middle of this mess, all of that at the next step. I think in that, what comes after that willingness to forgive and let go of all of that is a recognition that, you know, and I'm going to say this to you directly. You could not be the beautiful, wonderful, shining example of what it is to be a human being. If you have not gone through that stuff, right.

Speaker 3: 26:06

Still going through stuff and stuff will still come up again and it's

Speaker 4: 26:10

Right, right. So following on for that understanding that you could not be, you know, the contribution that you're being to your fellow human beings, just by being willing to mention that you've gone through that in your life and that you've healed yourself of it, be an example for people. Um, so, you know, beyond the forgiveness and beyond the acceptance of that is the recognition that you could not be who you are now, if that had not happened, right. To give you the strengths of characters or willingness to go forward, the next step is gratitude. Yeah. Right. You have to say despite how horrible it seemed. And despite the claim that I attached to it for all those years, at the end of the day, I'm kind of grateful that I went through that because I would not be the person I am today, if that had not happened to me. Yeah. That's a tough step for a lot of people.

Speaker 3: 27:06

Yes. And I'm going to say something there as well, which may not sit where a lot of people, both, um, you know, the strangest things happen in our life. And you know,

Speaker 4: 27:19

I I've, I've,

Speaker 3: 27:21

I I'm grateful for everything that's happened in my life. Look, I've had my tough times. Everybody has everyone has something that's happened or have had a heart hardship or whatever, vice. And there's always a learning in that. And I think that's really why we're putting it.

Speaker 4: 27:33

Art is to go on, to overcome what to live without.

Speaker 3: 27:40

They're not as harsh. The more we practice, um, choosing an outcome and our perception, the easier it gets. Right. And the more we learn, the more challenges and the heart of the challenges are, I think that's part of life and it's just making us stronger and really getting us closer and closer to who we are. What, um, what I was going to say was, yeah, I lost my daughter. My daughter died in 2007 and it was right on the data. She was due rice. And course when I was married and the husband wants to have a family and I was like, no way, I'm not a baby making machine or your MAs. And this was a joke for a few years. Right. And I was like, no way, but really want Anita art. I was terrified rice. And then we went for counseling and all that kind of stuff. And we eventually got married or not married. We got pregnant and a move to brand new house, bought a brand new card average and set our price left my job after 17 years had all me save and this is going to be perfect. But right on the day she was due, she died. And that was an absolute heartbreak. And I was like, well, why on the very day, like, it was like a massive knock on the door, you know? And I'm like, right on the day, I remember her last kick and everything on the course, what happened before was when I was very young having a child and I was 16 and it was just, it was like, I just didn't want to live all that kind of stuff was going on, why I couldn't take anymore. But I was asking myself, all these, why did this happen? Why, why, why? And stuff came to me, stuff started coming to me. You know, maybe it was a few months later or a few years, but it was when I was ready when I was ready to receive us. And today that is the reason that was, that was the change in my perception. That was my change in how I understood the power of who we are. Um, because from that I met a lovely spiritual lady who taught me how to love myself again. And I believe enough. Lot of people don't do that. We don't, we're giving ourselves a hard time all the time. We're like turning ourselves off for not being good enough for whatever. And I think that's a massive, um, not mistake, but like it's something we need to be really be aware of, is to give herself self love. And I discovered the power of how powerful our mind is and how we are as human beings. And I look at the data, my daughter's a gift and I wouldn't kind of say that to too many people cause they'd be like, what? But now I miss her every day. I have a photograph of her over here and I'm like, I miss her everyday. She's gorgeous, got to bring her home and everything. But I just see her as a gift. I see what happened to my life as a gift because I would not be where I am today. And I see if that didn't happen. So like things like always look for, always look not the lesson. I always look for something good. I remember my auntie saying that to me when she died, when my daughter died and she said, um, or God did this for a reason. And I was like, all the, I was doing a lot of cars and back then rice. But, uh, but now I see it. I see it now. There's like, everything happens and there's always something for you to see and everything that happens. And it's up to us as individuals to see the power in that and to take something out with us, no matter how tragic it seems and you know, anything is possible. It's, it's down to the power of our minds and it takes it out of practice and the people that we're surrounding ourselves with and all that sport. I just think it's incredible as they, how powerful we are as human beings. That's it,

Speaker 4: 31:08

You know, considering, you know, the, the absolute fact that we're co creating the entire reality we get to walk around and we are pretty damn powerful. Yes. When you think about that. Right. Um, so I'm, I'm just amazed at the journey that you're on. Um, and I'm, you know, celebrating how wonderful you are. It's great to talk to you. I don't know what I can possibly say to enhance what you're saying, because you're saying everything that needs to be saying, to be said to, you know, to uplift people's lives. I think the only other thing I would add to what you said there so far is that everybody needs to be reminded that they have the power to choose. Right. And you exemplify that you made that choice to look at something, to have a beneficial aspect or positive meaning to your life. That's a question of interpretation, right? Um, that's a choice you made. Everybody has a choice at all times. And every moment we have a choice to take a look at what's going on around us and allow that to determine how we feel about ourselves and our place in the world, or take and say, well, that happened because I wanted to be a better human being and that's going to help me be a better human being. That's just a matter of choice. Right. You can say, okay, that happened that therefore life sucks, right? Like just totally sucks. And that, that is proof. That's proof that life sucks, right? Or you can say make the choice that happened. And in that thing, that happened, there is a lesson. There is a way for me to grow. There was a way for me to choose, to become a bigger, better human being. Um, and there is something wonderful that will come out of that, right? That's just a matter of choice. And we all have that choice in every single moment with everything that's going on, right. We always have that choice. And if people can be reminded of that power, that they have that wonderful ability to choose in any given moment, uh, how to be in the world, how to respond to the, you know, what's going on out in the world and how to choose to go out and say, no matter what's going on, right. I can be joyful. I can be contributory. I can be creative. I can go out and be a blessing to my fellow human beings. Right. And I can say, this is me flawed completely here with as many or more flaws than anybody else. But nevertheless, I recognize that I am capable of choosing how I am going out into the world and what I'm doing. And I choose to do some things that are contributory and creative for the rest of humanity. If we, if everybody made that choice, can you imagine what kind of world?

Speaker 3: 34:13

Oh my God, incredible. Yeah, absolutely incredible. And it doesn't take much, Leslie, like, you know, like we talk about this, that the levels of consciousness, right. And all the different emotions or whatever, fear, jealousy, anger, and then you can go to love compassionate, all that, the higher vibrations and all of that, I suppose, you know, it can, it can take something small, like holding the door open for somebody, um, or carrying somebody messages home for them are Latin somebody's own shopping, something small that we'll have to raise the, that the best. And the more you do that, you know, the more your vibration will raise about your field because as human beings, we're wired to help each other to, um, you know, make life easier with Gus. That's what we're worried to do. And look, we're human beings too. And I think it's important to say I do a lot of justifying a times because I go back to that human mode or whatever, but I can bounce back out of it again. But I think it's important to say I'm not always happy and joyful and stuff. I do get depressed. I do get fear. I do, you know, but, um, and I think that's part of being human and it's okay. There's nothing wrong with us, but it's when you are aware of us and you can catch it a lot quicker, the more you practice it, the more you can get yourself out of that. And you know what to do, however, small, just to raise the vibrational political base or gratitude, as you say, that's a parent really, really powerful. And I love to, it could be something really, really small. Like, like I went from a cycle, stand on, pedal, fell off my bike, but I went for a cycle today and it was great, you know, and the weather is fantastic. And my daughter is at the back and our pool there at the moment. And it's just grace, but I'm really just, you know, bringing yourself back to sort of small, however small it is to raise your vibration. I think that's really, and it's just always something there's always something free to celebrate your wins.

Speaker 4: 36:10

Oh, absolutely. There are so many blessings. Right. Um, yeah. And that, I think that's key is to learn, to count your blessings right. Rather than to catalog all the, you know, the bad things that are out there. Yeah.

Speaker 3: 36:25

They were great. I, you, in the army. Yeah.

Speaker 4: 36:30

Um, if we, if we simply count our blessings, um, it changes the way we look at things. Right. And when we change the way we look at things, so things we look at change, right? Yeah. So it's, um, I think a wonderful thing that you're doing with these heart to heart conversations, because you're opening yourself up to the world and people need to see how wonderful you are. Cause I don't, you know, maybe you do think you need a guest to bounce things off of, you know? Um, but I think it's you that people need to see because you are such a shining light.

Speaker 3: 37:08

Thank you, Leslie. Well, I just started my mastermind last week and that's going incredibly well. So I've had a lot of unveiling. My mastermind is all about pairing people. Okay. Cause that's what it's all about is empowering people to see the greatness that the, who they are. Um, and it's really, my mastermind is drawing in what our health professionals and doctors and life coaches or any kind of coach to empower them, to impair their clients. And, and so far I've only had one mastermind and it's great. And I've had lot of semesters there today. Are you having another one tomorrow? And so I've lost the people coming tomorrow. So I'm really excited about it because it's not something Leslie, it's, it's all these great people who have something to offer. And I'm not an expert in everything in all areas of health, rice. I know Alaska, but I still have a lot to learn as well. Right. And that's okay. And I think really when you know who to go to or who to ask, to find out the information that you need, it's really, really incredibly important. You don't have to know it all like you really don't. And um, you know, and even like, lastly, the very first time that I met you, I remember we done a talk together and I was like, Oh my God, let's do finger. Right. And honest to God. I was like, Oh my God, I'm going to be talking on stage. But Leslie, because I was like, Oh, and um, let you call us. I was like, Oh my God, my speech is going to have to be perfect and blah, blah, blah. And how am I going to compare, Oh, this crap. Like, it's just incredible. But we're all human beings at the end of the day. And we need to see each other all as human beings, we all have flaws. It doesn't matter how successful or not successful. We're all on this planet together to, to help each other. You know, it doesn't matter how better it does, none of that, how better or more successful or whatever. We're all human beings. And we all have something to offer and it doesn't matter what status that we are. And I think it's really important for people to get that and not to be afraid to go out and talk to people and communicate with people and, you know, just create relationship with people. And it's really vital. It's so vital. What are you doing on zoom or meeting them in person? Obviously I love going for cups of coffee and meeting in person, but any way that you can, because I think it's in conversation, Leslie, that is where you get most of your true Halen from is in conversation. You get to discover things, thus, you know, if you went to a counselor or whatever, like, you know, terror P these talk therapy things, and it's in conversation that you find out who you really are and what you're really passionate about, and you get these aha moments in a conversation. And I just think if we didn't have to speak, you have to express yourself and speak and talk to people, you know, God knows what will come up, you know?

Speaker 4: 39:52

Yeah, absolutely. You need to be in a relationship with other people because first of all, that's why we're here. Second of all, part of human nature. Right. Um, but also in the act of speaking and listening to another human being, you get to be in communion with that other individual. Right. And it's more than the words that are spoken and the willingness to be open and communicate with somebody else. It's also the fact that when you come in with an open heart and an open mind to the conversation, you actually are changing your vibratory eminence, right? What you are putting out, you know, the invisible stuff that, you know, normally people don't pay any attention to, um, that, you know, we are electromagnetic creatures, right? So our heart emanates energy, right? Our mind puts out energy and we do that. So when we are in direct communication with another human being, we are actually energetically impacting them, not just intellectually impacting them, not just, you know, making them angry or happy or something, by the words, we are energetically impacting them and changing who they are energetically. Right. So if we walk into a conversation, knowing that, and our intention is to uplift their energy levels, to bring them up, to say a higher frequency, just, I mean, the language is imperfect and describing because, you know, lower frequency, higher frequency, there's a moral judgment, but to, to, to raise their vibration up so that they actually feel better about who they are, have a, you know, innate kind of understanding about, Oh wow. As you know, it feels good to be alive after they've talked to you, then that's, I think important to understand that you have, can have that impact on people just by your presence and your willingness to be in communion with them.

Speaker 3: 42:01

Isn't it incredible though, isn't it incredible how effective we are as human beings and the impact that we have. And, you know, I don't know if you've read anything from heart, the heart, my institutes, and about the energy of the heart is massive. Like it's absolutely massive. And that that energy can go out so far. And it's like, when you walk into a room and there's a couple of people in room, does that have been an argument you can sensor, like, that's just incredible. And it's the same. The opposite is the same. So as he saved, my energy is higher as somebody else's is high it's infectious. And it's, it's just great. That's why it's so great to be around, um, you know, energetic people, um, people who are bubbly or lively or whatever, it's really important to, um, you know, to, to, to have that type of energy in your life as well. And, but also you're gonna come across people who are down or depressed or whatever, and you can help to raise their vibration. And that's an incredible gift to be able to do that. What I would even speak in a word like, you know, having that energy, it's just, it's just incredible how, and to be aware of that, to be how, um, how empowering that you can be and infectious to people as well when you're around them.

Speaker 4: 43:16

Well, every little, every little thing that you do right. Creates, um, an effect in the world, right? Cause we are causative. That's, that's our nature we are caused of. Right. So, you know, and you can say things to people simply like this. If you're walking down the street and you smile at a stranger, right? You could change their entire life. As you know, it's possible. You could even save their life. Right. They might be feeling suicidal at that moment. And the fact that somebody acknowledged them as a human being looked into their eyes and smiled at them, they might've given them that little bit of hope that they need to go on in life. Right. So you can know, that's maybe just kind of like this weird example of how you can change things in the world. But if you go out into the world and you understand that the way that you be in the world, right. Definitely has an impact. I mean, there's no way around that. Right. So if you're out there and you're being negative, right. You produce negative, energetic results out into the world. Right. You impact other people's lives. So those angry people at the party or the, you know, the people who are all scattered and whatnot, they have an energetic on the people around them and the people that walk into the room and they, you know, they brighten the room by their mere presence when they walk in. Right. We all have experienced that. Right. So it's undeniably true. We've all experienced it. Somebody just by their mere presence, uplifts the energy of the room. Right. That's like, it's an amazing thing. So when we recognize that we can all do that. And then we decide that we're going to do that. And the way that we walk through life, like you go to the grocery store, you know, you engage the clerk, you know, you smile, you ask them how they're doing. You just project love and compassion, you know, respect for the jobs that they're doing and all of that kind of stuff. If you just walk through life, being intentional like that, you can change the world.

Speaker 3: 45:17

Yeah. Yeah. And I love the whole concept of, um, the payer forwards do unto others, as you would have to do onto you. I love that whole pay it forward thing, you know? And, um, again, it's infectious, you know, like doing somebody like that, like you were saying, you know, the way I give a good remark or a good comment about the weight or, you know, little things like that, little things just paint a forward and a can really brighten up some of these data and something smart like us, you know, you talked a lot about at success, Leslie, in your program. And, uh, you talk a lot about that Napoleon Hill. Um, and that's a success and you were saying there about B being all in the being. And, uh, so how we're being reflects out into the world. So it all kind of starts with obviously our talks, but then it transmutes into how we're being. Um, so when we're being of a high energy state, it causes us to have our do and have, and that's the results that we get. So, um, I remember when I heard that from you last night, I've heard it from many other people as well. That's in the state of being how we're being. And we always have the choice of how we're being, um, causes us to, to, to have what it is that we want in our life. So everything starts with the being is what I'm saying. And that's really, when I got that, I was like, Oh my God. Yeah, that's so true. Like it's all in how we're being ourselves now because of what Joe did over there to me or whatever, it's all in how we're being. And I think that's just absolutely so powerful. And when we understand that and really get us, um, that it will give us more power to choose, to be a certain way. And we can, we can do this. We can sometimes it's, it's, it's very simple, but it's not easy. So

Speaker 4: 47:04

Yeah, that, that was a, a lesson that I learned. Um, I read in my twenties when I was in a relatively tough predicament, my mother sent me a book by Victor Frankl called man's search for meaning. And he talks about the time that he was in the concentration camps in the second world war. Um, and watching the, you know, we complain about how Tufts the world is. Right. Okay. So here's a bunch of people stuck in concentration camps and daily, some of them were dying and all of them were suffering more enormously than we can possibly imagine. Right. Um, and he was watching the way that individuals responded to their circumstances. Right. So dire, dire, dire circumstances, and people making different choices about how to respond to their circumstances. Right. And some of the people, you know, they were, they were like completely caught up in victim hood. Right. Which is like more than understandable. Right. Because they were being victimized at a level that we can't even imagine happening to us. Right. So, but they were completely caught up in victim hood and there were other people identical in the same exact circumstances who were going out of their way to do their best, to uplift those around them, to comfort them, to do whatever. So, and that was just a choice, right. So am I going to feel the victim here or I'm going to be what I can be for my fellow human beings. Right. And so he said, uh, and his books that everything he said, they, um, everything can be taken away from us. Right. Everything, all of our dignity, all of our freedom, all of our physical wellbeing, our mental, emotional, all of that can be taken away from us, except for our ability to choose how to respond in every, given any given circumstance. Right. Except for that, that can never be taken away from us. Right. So we are, and that had like those massive impact on me at the time, because like I said, my circumstances are very dire and I was feeling kind of victimized. Um, lastly yeah, poor poor me. So at that changed my mind at the time. And it has carried forward with me through all these years later, is that no matter what's going on, that I have the ability to choose how to look at things, what that perception, how to respond, how to go about being in the world and, you know, there's proof to me and that in my own life, not external proof in my own life is that, uh, as long as I am willing to accept responsibility or choosing my States as being, as how I go about being, how I think, how I feel, you know, what I believe and how I perceived things out in the world, as long as I'm willing to take responsibility for that choice of perceptions. Um, and that choice of reaction, if you will, the better my life is like enormously better. If I choose to see a glorious sunrise, then the day is glorious. If I choose to catalog my blessings and the day is glorious, right. If I choose to, you know, list all the slings and arrows, that lifestyle was at me, then life sucks. So, you know, um, I think it's pretty understand. Yeah.

Speaker 3: 50:50

It's funny. Like when you said that as well as, see what comes to mind is, you know, when we're feeling a certain way, like silks or whatever, then for the rest of that day, the tenders are up and that's all that we're saying. And, and for the rest of the day. So, you know, the saying that whatever side of the bed you've got on in the morning, like, you know, what the rest of your day is going to be like that. So, so, yeah. And when you notice that in an instant, if you can change us, you can't change and not F put, look, I suppose, some people are going, Oh yeah. And all of this, but I think it takes practice, Leslie, and it is very doable and it is possible. Like, it definitely, definitely is. And look, you've done it, I've done. I'm still doing it. You're like, I'm never going to come across stuff every day. I'm a human being. So we are going to fall. It's a, it's an ebb and flow life is, and it's not always going to be perfect. But I think in experiencing fear or anger or whatever, that's when we can experience the order, you know, the joy and everything else. And I think even, you know, one more angry or whatever, whatever experiences I think, um, even when we're angry, it's, it gives us a bit of a push to, uh, it's not something that we desire. So it gives us kind of a push to remove that from the roadblock, if you like, so anger, isn't always necessarily too bad. I don't take it. Like he can go lower and lower. Like I think shame and guilt are very, very heavy, like some kind of ways that you're feeling that can be very, very heavy and very hard to get out of what does always hope. There's always a glimmer of hope. And I think it's just to be aware of how you're feeling and to ask yourself why, and then, you know, what can I do to get out with this? And, you know, what's important to me. Um, but I just, I just love this whole conversation around time, the choice and, and been empowered to know that we have this choice. So let's see we're coming up close to the era now. And I read I'm so, so appreciative of your time, but Leslie, this is a great conversation. I could talk to you for another hour, but I'm conscious. And, um, but really what I want to ask is just to wrap up, um, and, and you gave us a good, um, uh, you know, idea around choice and how powerful that is, but what do you want to leave people with to be really empowered, to take control of their life again, to, you know, that there is hope and that it's possible, anything is possible. What, what message or, you know, how, uh, what, what message do you want to leave people with so that they are really, really empowered in their life?

Speaker 4: 53:18

Well, I think, you know, particularly in the circumstances that we're all in right now, right, where there is this whole big cloud of fear, um, that is, you know, has descended upon people. Um, I think the big message I want to say is that, you know, we are all of us capable of being loving, right? And fear prevents you from being who you are. The fullest expression of yourself fears is, is like a constrictor, right? It stops you from thinking clarity. It stops you from feeling, you know, the fullness of yourself and your relationship to your world. It stops you from trusting and being open to other people. I mean, you know, the whole idea of being afraid of your neighbor and having to social distance and, you know, all of this fear is so inhibiting. So the message that I want to say to people I think is, is that, you know, take your shoes off, stand on the bear on the ground, right. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that love is the answer to everything.

Speaker 3: 54:35

That's beautiful. That really, really is beautiful. Yeah. And the third there is love. There is still love out there in the world and from your neighbor. And everybody wants that last week.

Speaker 4: 54:45

Yes. Desperately.

Speaker 3: 54:47

So, you know, I mean, why not show a small piece of appreciation, a small kind gesture to somebody and start from there. Um, and yeah, uneconomic role and the more people that are aware of this, the more people who know that they can have love in their life. And it just grows Lesley, and it can be so empowering and having that ripple effect as well, because that's what we do all want. And we all want peace and love at the end of the day. And that's beautiful. Let's say I don't want to go.

Speaker 4: 55:20

I love talking to you too joy.

Speaker 3: 55:23

I have to go and make the dinner. Don't have to come back to the real world. Now I'll make my dinner. So listen, as we know, I really want to really acknowledge you for the super human being that you are in the world for me, for everybody, um, for all our mastermind calls that we have together and for who you are for the whole world. Um, because you know, it has that ripple effects that energy, as you say, it really does have that. And we do need more people like you as the, and I truly do appreciate you. And I do truly appreciate at the time that we've spent here together. So thank you week.

Speaker 4: 55:55

Well, thank you for the opportunity to Joanne. Go have a great dinner. I will put some love food. Thank you.

Speaker 3: 56:06

Thank you for joining us on the empowering family health podcast. If you liked what you heard and you want to hear more, please subscribe to the upcoming half and remember to share with your friends. So that day to come be.